Monday, May 02, 2005

When Not Even A Hummer Can Hide Your Problems

The CXT:

When we first heard about the coming vehicular evil that is the CXT, we thought that ignoring it might make it go away. But, alas, it seems our roads will soon be clogged by a ridiculous truck niche-marketed to men with genitalia-inadequacy issues so severe they can’t even be salved by driving a Hummer—call them the “innie crowd.” A reader spots a CXT in the most conspicuous of locations, The Grove:

I’ve just seen the most offensive vehicle driving on the road, the CXT Monster Truck. I read about it on Friday and thought “there’s no way anyone would actually drive this.” But I forgot I was in LA. Less than 24 hours later I spotted the first one - at The Grove on Saturday morning. It is definitely a head-turner. People are incredulous because this thing just screams “I’m a wanker with way too much money.” I’m sure Paris Hilton will be driving a pink one down Sunset by the end of the week.

Sure, this beast only gets seven miles per gallon, but it more than makes up for those shortcomings with a standard console Viagra dispenser, and failing a chemical solution to that particular problem, a staggering array of optional aftermarket strap-ons. Can’t wait to see one of these bad boys rolling around near the CAA offices. Happy motoring!

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